Monday, June 2, 2008
haven been blogging lately ..
been fucking hell busy this few days ..
holidays just started and it wasnt something nice ..
work work and more work ...
ii really dunno what the hell things going on ..
stuffs ii need to do ..
- T3 work
- SimLimSq work
- ClassBBQ
- ClassTee
- IG meetings & events
there's just so much things and so little time ..
my schdule for the first week ..
Fri 30/05 - T3 7pm to 11pm
Sat 31 / 05 - T3 9am to 10 pm
Sun 01 / 06 - T3 12pm to 11pm
Mon 02 / 06 -
T3 12pm to 5pm , then go buy BBQ stuff
Tue 03 / 06 - Class BBQ ( Whole Day )
Wed 04 / 06 - SimLimSq - Redemption
Thur 05 / 06 - T3 9am to 11pm
Fri 06 / 06 - T3 9am to 5pm , then bring mum out for bdae dinner
Sat 07 / 06 - SimLimSq - Host Assistant
Sun 08 /06 - IG Event 8am to 4pm
that's practically how ii am going to spend my first week of holiday ..
ii dunno how ii am going to pass through ..
when so much things just happen ..
kind of really very upset with June in T3 ..
felt dissappointed with her .. really do ..
the treatment ii received from her was really fuck ..
yar .. ii cried on Sat after work .. ii broke down ..
ii am really hurt .. have been thinking ..
am ii having a problem or is she having a problem with me ..
ii am feeling very strange ..
ii doubt ii have did anything wrong in work nor in personal stuff with you ..
but why are you treating me this way ?? ..
at times .. looking from far ..
ii see you laugh and joke around with others ..
the moment you are near me .. things changed ..
ii dunno am ii thinking too much or what .. ii hope ii am ..
but the feeling is really intolerant ..
always wanted to find a chance to talk to you ..
but you always seems to be unwilling to .. or have ii found the wrong time ??
what ii wanted was just really to help the outlet ..
ii enjoy working here .. the friends and people ii know ..
dont mind going to the extreme to just work the whole shifts ..
understand that as a resturant manager you faced with problems too ..
you are vexed and irritated .. but everyone else do too ..
ii just dunno .. ii really dont .. tired ..
mum and dad are worried
things in the family are not going well for me ..
often quarreling with mum for my late home arrivals ..
not resting enough and not having my meals at home ..
just at times .. ii really just wann work ..
ii cant have the feeling of not doing anything ..
my mind was move .. ii must be busy ..
ii want to do things that is challenging
and the perfection of the stuff just makes me feel better
regardless the hardwork placed in ..
after being the daughter for so many years ..
ii really know too much secrets and stuff that is going on ..
somehow .. ii really feel like voicing out my mind to mum ..
bu it nve seems to be okiies .. ii am sorry ..
ii am really driving my parents nuts .. making them worry ..
ii really hope to lessen all this ..
yesterday during work .. was the host for the morning ..
there were alot of kids around .. especially Table11 ..
the kids were adorable and they are very friendly ..
looking at them .. ii thought about me ..
can ii ever go back to the past ?? ..
the thoughts of theirs are just so clear .. their smiles are really very real ..
and they make friends easily with other kids ..
the curiosity mind of theirs make them look perfect ..
when the younger brother falls down ..
the elder brother helped him up .. hug and kiss him ..
told me that his didi pain pain .. the words from their mouth melts my heart ..
when was the last time ii bothered about my brothers this way ??
the kids walked to me hugged me .. and gave me a good-bye kiss ..
isint that sweet enough ?? .. they really bring joy to my work ..
on the other hand thinking .. should ii slow down my pace for life ?? ..
flare my temper up last night after work on HUBBY ..
felt that he is working fucking hell and halim as a sup is like slacking ..
ii am really very angry .. yar .. heartaches more ..
maybe ii just dunno how to control my temper and said those words ..
told Helen that ii wants to quit .. and my words were harsh ..
ii am sorry about that .. but what ii know now really makes me cant control ..
whatever it is .. ii know there's too much consideration for me to take in ..
the world will not stop bcos of one person .. it will continues to move on no matter who ii am ..
lost my hp further caused me more problems ..
and for the hell thing .. ii dunno how did ii lost it ..
ii just cant rmb a thing after having a call with weijun .. got on a cab ..
has totally down shattered .. called up the cab uncle and he say he didnt found anything ..
but the strange thing is my phone still gets through till this morning ..
ii guess the battery must have been flat ..
currently at T3 food court ..
told teety what happen and requested to off today ..
have too much stuff to settle ..
ii am mentally and physically drained ..
what ii should do now is really to settle the upcoming issues like
ClassBBQ and family stuff ..
really hope that my hp can be found ..
regardless by who or where .. my hp is impt to me ..
its not bcos of the value of it .. is the impt stuff in it ..
ii really need it .. and ii hate myself for being so careless ..
HUBBY .. ii am sorry to caused you with so much trouble and pain ..
seeing you this way .. ii really dunno who the hell ii am ..
if ii am able to .. ii want to change the time and the things that happen ..
feel like saying lets break up .. but ii cant bring myself to ..
ii just really love you too much too ..
thanks for being there for me .. what ii really need now is your support ..
` [[ BABYvan ]] ♥
11:03 AM
BabyFriendster 